I’m often told things that I just have no idea about. It doesn’t really worry me but, it is so frustrating both for those asking the question, I often see and feel their frustration, and for me, because I so much want to be apart of our past.
The greatest pain hits when I see the faces change, ‘You must know, you know when….?’
I think there may be confusion about my forgetting. It seems to me that they think I must regret what I’ve forgotten, but more often that not, I don’t. It is not a deliberate act to shut that memory out of my mind, it is just not apart of my conscious anymore.
What I am also aware of, and is something that happens to us all, is that moment when something pops back into your mind when you were not even thinking about it. The memory and pathways to that moment must be there, somewhere so, I got to thinking, maybe I haven’t forgotten that moment, maybe it is just that the pathways to it, have got a bit mixed up.
To build new pathways you need to have triggers to the memory and then, revisit that memory over and over. Try making the memory novel in some way, by doing this there is a greater chance of making that connection and the greater the chance for it remaining. The tricks to help strengthening memories are well known. Such as exaggerating that memory, using all your senses and try and link it to something you already have a firm grip of. Just remember this memory is inside your head, so you can make it yours and hopefully, memorable!
It is never my intention to hurt anyone, so now, when I hear, Do you remember when, this, or that time, and I don’t, I smile, I do.
It is not about forgetting, but more about not remembering.
Categories:Dementia Related Post