I’ve never been here before.
I didn’t have a good night, but then again I don’t sleep as I think I should. I take my night tablets and then wait for the shutting down.
My life seems to be a mix, a blurring of a dream and reality. I’m sure we all have had those moments when waking up, we have to give the dream time to fade and truth to take a grip. However, for me, that moment is drifted by over and over and over.
My day is not alone but shared with what I call my companions. Most I’m pleased to know are there, while others torment and disturb. They flit in and out as my reality changes. This morning, I lay there, ‘You got to get up, You got to get up,’ my morning call and I was in an old railway station. Like an old movie, there was an old train at the platform, with billowing steam filling the view and then that voice, booming and mechanical. ‘You have never been here before!’ Repeating, again and again, then faded as I became aware of me.
This is usually how my day begins. Something will be there sitting in my mind, tapping to be heard, to be given meaning.
I see them as messages from the other me inside my head. All I have to do is unravel them.
So, I’ve never been here before. That’s true, but it is also true for everyone. I then realised that this is undoubtedly something we rarely, if ever contemplate. Why think of it now? What purpose does it serve, if any?
As I lay there, I realised that what I do today, from what I can, will determine the life I am to experience. I think this is what it means. I have to get up, be active, physically and mentally to ensure I enjoy life as best as I can.
This is a message we all must follow. Don’t let your life pass. Take what you have and use it to the full!
I’ve heard in songs, that time passes slowly, but that’s not true. It may feel that sometimes when longing for those special moments, but before we know it, you’re looking back and wondering where it has gone, and what is left.
I’ve never been here before and you most certainly have never been here before either, and we will never be here again!
So grab life with both hands, do what you can, enjoy life as best as you can. Be the best you today and live in the light!
Please comment on anything I have said. Thank You!
Categories: Dementia Related Post